Of gag reflexes.

I hate taking pills. I've never been comfortable with taking pills, and to be honest, would rather live with most issues rather than popping medication. I don't take paracetamol unless I have a fever, I don't take any painkillers for any pain, I just stay away from medication and either man up or go down the more natural and holistic approach. Pills just aren't a part of my life, and so I am not familiar enough with the idea of just swallowing something big enough to choke on. 

So when I got prescribed with a course of antibiotics yesterday, and then picked them up only to discover they are the size of fucking carrots, you can imagine my issue. I drank a whole litre of water trying to take the first one last night, as well as a yoghurt. The experience was so stressful I had to eat half a box of after eights to calm myself down (so much for the diet). Today wasn't so bad, but still pretty traumatic for something that should be so simple. I've also been prescribed with two months worth of naproxen, which can apparently cause your tummy to explode or something, so fingers crossed that doesn't happen. Those pills are pretty big too, but they're powder so I can just bite them in half. 

I looked up as to why I have this issue, and apparently it's something you either get over or have a life long problem with from about the age of 10, or something old people develop as they get older. So I guess at 10 I was like nope to pills and mushed them up in jam while everyone else was learning how to not be a pussy.

Either that or I am in fact a young person stuck in an old persons body, disguised as a young person's body. 

New Year Do-over

I'm going to start again.

I started really well. I fasted on New Year's Day and had really high hopes. But then feeling really shitty in a sort of 'eat everything especially all the bad stuff and don't do anything productive at all' way kinda messed things up. 

Tomorrow is a Monday. I've finished all my Christmas junk. I'm significantly enough over my cold. I am full of determination. 

Eating right. Exercising consistently. Being proactive and productive. Let's do this.

Keep In Touch

2015 marks an end of an era type deal for me. 

Or maybe it's better to phrase it as a start of a new one. 

For nearly 6 years, I've worked really hard and really struggled at making my film career a viable option. I've had doubts but I've never really faultered on this ultimately being what I want to do. But now, I've reached the decision that it will never be a realistic long term and financially profitable career path, and have decided to move on. That's not to say that I won't still dabble if things come my way and I can do them, but more that film work is no longer my primary focus. A hobby, if you like, to fit around my normal life rather than vice versa. 

I was in the shower just now, and Super Junior's "keep in touch" came up in shuffle. It got me thinking. I consider myself to have made some good friends during my film career, but how many of those will stay in touch when I leave the industry and therefore am surplus to their professional requirements? How many people will still talk to me and seem to genuinely care about me when I no longer work for or with them? Relationships in film are intense things, people know everything about you in very intimate detail within a very short amount if time. Sure most of those relationships disappear into the ether as soon as the wrap party is over, but some are a little more lasting. But how many friendships would survive me being out of that world altogether? I doubt any to be honest, and that makes me really sad.