Trying to be Grown Up.

So apparently I cant blog before midnight. It like literally doesn't even occur to me to start until it is technically tomorrow. Which is fine, I guess, it's not like I have a deadline or anything. The whole point of this is for me to write what I want, so I don't know why doing so at a specific time should be any more important than the content.

Wow, that just fills you with excitement about what I may be posting about in the future, doesn't it?

I'm a little scared right now. In the morning, I am going to introduce myself at a charity school where I may be teaching small groups of children how to sew. I know how to sew, and I have done it many times before, so this is a good start. On the other hand, I do not know how to teach, and I have never really dealt with children before, especially in any from of authoritative role. I've never had to deal with children before full stop. Not since I was one at any rate.

I don't even know how to start.

I'm assured the whole thing is really relaxed and easy going, and I'm sure it is, but it doesn't change the fact that for me, this is something brand new. I get nervous at the best of times, but I am at least somewhat used to going in to new groups of people. Jon, one of best friend's fiance's, and the man who put me up for this, only knows me as the person I am around my friends, when I am content and comfortable. He assured me that I was the sort of person who would be good with these children, but I doubt he has ever seen any of the other side to me. The person I am around my family isn't the same as the person I am around my friends, although those variations are far more similar than the person I am when I am at work or in unfamiliar situations.

I feel unprepared. I don't know what to expect, and that's what bothers me most. I don't know how to go about teaching a class, no matter if its one child or a hundred. Health and safety is something that is playing heavily on my mind, as much of the textile techniques that are the most fun and interesting can also be somewhat dangerous, so how can I know what I will need to ask for them to prepare for my sessions when I don't know what they will be allowed to do?

This is a rant post, as I am sure you are aware. I know that I am getting far too panicked about what is no more than a meet and greet, and I am excited. I do think that it will be something worthy of at least trying out. I might enjoy it and decide to become a teacher. After all, now is the perfect time for me to be experimenting with different career paths.

I know I'll be fine, but it is still a step into the unknown.

<3 x